Everything Has Its Price
A farmer named Muldoon lived alone in the country with a dog that he loved. After many long years of faithful companionship, the dog died, so Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked "Father, my dear old dog is dead. Could you be sayin' a Mass for him?"
Father Patrick replied, "I am so very sorry to hear about your dog's death. But, unfortunately, I can't say Mass for the poor creature..."
Muldoon said, "I understand, Father. I guess I'll go to this new denomination down the road; no tellin' what they believe... Do you think $500 is enough to donate for the service?"
Father Patrick: "Why didn't you tell me your dog was Catholic?!"
Here's a more recent variation of that joke, except this time it's real (thanks to Thomas Edwards for this link)!
SANTA MONICA, Calif. (KABC) -- "Santa Monica is looking to ease restrictions on match making. The city had banned such businesses for nearly 60 years. The ordinance prohibiting professional matchmakers dates back to 1954. The city council will consider the change on Tuesday night.
Matchmaking companies could bring the city more revenue. Online matchmaker eHarmony is currently trying to move their headquarters to Santa Monica, but if the ban is not lifted, the move won't happen."